Saturday, December 25, 2010

CHRISTMAS COMES WITH FEW REPORTED PROBLEMS


AP- Early reports tell us that after a shaky start Christmas came as usual this year. Fred Claus apparently did get to most kids and the ones that were missed will be made up later today. All indications are that Fred was 99.3 % effective in Santa's absence this year. This falls within the normal percentage of effectiveness by Santa.

Earlier this morning we asked Fred what he thought about being the official Santa this year and he stated: " I never knew how tough this job really was nor did I expect much from doing it but I was pleasantly surprised. The children were very gracious with their snacks and it was very humbling to visit so many homes that count on Santa for a real Christmas."

Fred went on further to say, "let the world know that no matter what happens with the current charges against my brother Santa that I promise them Christmas will continue each and every year. In future years we will grow it to be even bigger and better than before."

With the exception of the normal few who complain that they didn't get everything they asked for, at first glance it appears that this year's Christmas has been favorably received.

In many areas this year included a White Christmas that is not usual for some parts. Mother Nature sent a statement:

"With the recent problems associated with Santa and some of his staff I felt like it was more important than ever to lend a helping hand to all those who truly believe. With that in mind I decided to relax the rules a bit this year and allow snow where usually there is not any. I hope that this helps in some small way keep the spirit of a White Christmas alive in the hearts and minds of so many people."

The snow was well received in the communities and many were very thankful for the generosity of Mother Nature.

While the coming months will certainly be a bit tumultuous for Santa and friends it is very comforting to know that Christmas will continue in the tradition most have become accustomed to. The newly formed Elves Liberation Front (ELF) even had this to say:

"The events of the last few days have been disheartening to say the least. We have always only wanted what is best for the kids. It appears now that we may finally be able to relax and focus on that singular goal. Our heartfelt thanks goes out to Fred Claus for his generosity in stepping forward to help the children. With such a huge undertaking we were unsure of how this would play out. Fred has done a masterful job of maintaining the excellence of Christmas.

A sincere thanks to Mother Nature as well for her role in helping keep the spirit of Christmas alive. We look forward to working with Fred Claus to address the concerns we have and help move forward to a new brighter future.

It has been a tumultuous year to say the least around the world and the thought of Christmas not coming would have been a major catastrophe to many. Thanks to the efforts of a few that has been averted.

This story should be an example to all of what can be accomplished by putting the needs ahead of selfish wants. Governments around the world...are you listening?"
Well said indeed........

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Ed Springston

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